Well, I have to add a gif image. Please 'cuse me for that.

Anyway, hello again. Been a whole year not coming at all, but here we are. Finally.


This is not some kind of resolution shit or new years goal thing, but more likely a, just like the title, is a "Thank You" note.
I want to wrote it down on my instagram account at first, put it on the instastory like what I always do - you know, documenting like every single thing I do every hour on stories like people give a shit while they don't - but then  I changed my mind because well, first, I kind of tired - and lazy - to edit and write it in short (I mean, I cannot write a long ass thank you essay on instastory cause who will read that stuff and it's not the place); and second, I guess I'll be rambling way too much, the thank you note will not get the point at all.
So yeah, I think I should just write it down here. On my blog. Where a long post is more common and acceptable. And less people annoyed by my long-ass written text when to stumbled upon my story on their instagram account.

And so here it is.



Anyway, please pardon that "on this first day" because, as said, I planned to post it yesterday on the first day of new year, but then too lazy to write it down and edit it to become aesthetic. So yeah, ignore it.  Anyway, tho it is not a 'set your goals' post, but this is some kind of 'reflection of last year' post, and a 'be better next year' post, similar like the post below.
Well, kinda.
Well, probably.
Well, we'll see.

Anyway, I shall start ranting and rambling, shouldn't I?


As what I said on my instagram's post aka my #bestnine post on my feed that is probably can be called as my reflection of my year kind of post, 2018 was the year where my mood for whole year is: Disappointed But Not Surprised.

Again, have to put it down. Sorry not sorry.

Where am I? Oh yeah, disappointed, but not surprised.

To sum it up - and make it easier and faster cause I'm lazy and it's already half past 4 in the morning - I will just copy and paste it from my instagram account, to here.

Funny how people you're super close with at the beginning of the year, is now no one and even feel like stranger at the end of the year. And funny how people who at the beginning of the year was clearly a stranger, is now super close to you, and you can share like almost everything with that person.Crazy how when i start this year i never thought i will get close to this person, but now before end this year, i somehow feel like i probably cant live without this person; even got worried and consider probably shall not hang too tight to this person, cause well, in the end, it will only be me and myself. 

Anyway, also as I said on my post on my instagram, there are people who helped me get through these year. People that, some are, in the description I wrote above. People that, with or without knowing it, have contribute so much in my life last year, that I myself realize even more, last couple of days.

So, you see, back to instagram story again, that a day or two before 2018 ended, I look back to all those instastories I posted the whole year, started from the beginning of 2018, as well as the feeds posts on my account. I gotta admit that I'm quite attached to my phone and instagram account that, there is no way I did not post anything, at least once in a day, on my story.
No. way.

But then, when look at it at the end of the year, it feels like all the memories come back, and honestly, it is kind of better reflection of what have you done the whole year, and what events happen to you.

So, to sums up life in 2018, couple of things shall be the highlight.

1. Resigned (and again)
In total, just in 2018, I submitted my resignation letter twice. Once from SNP, and once from DanaRupiah. Well, actually three if I counted this last one. But, it still not final and yet I still kind of work with them, so yeah, let's just go with two.
People probably knew I changed office and workplace quite some time, and stay like around a year only and then go. You may or may not agree in my view that your contribution and quality of work is better and more valuable than the period you stay in particular office. But, we're not talking about that now, so we can set it aside.
Anywa, resigning is kind of hard, actually. Because you keep looking for the right time to submit your letter.  Monday is not good cause it's beginning of the week and whole week will ruined. Tuesday is quite good but you probably out of office - or your boss out of office - and Wednesday probably the same. Thursday and  Friday is quite good cause it's kind of almost weekend, but it's most likely you are asked to 'think about it' and then 'give me final answer next week' kind of thing, so yeah. Again.
Not easy at all.
But still, I did that in 2018, and hopefully not again in 2019. We really need to changed, Ribka.

2. Unemployed
Yea well, what do you expect? I was unemployed for a month, and tho it was my decision to do so - and said that  I want to have a break and real holiday - but really, a month is quite long, apparently. But I am also glad that I can accompanied mom to go to Penang last year, and go with her to check her health.  It all good, btw. And please keep praying that it will always be good.
But anyway, unemployed. First week probably super fun, while second week you start feel bored.  Third week you already bored, and the realization that no salary this month, will start kick in. And forth week? Now you realize that you're poor, you little stupid bitch that never think twice before make a decision! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU THINKING WHEN YOU WROTE DOWN THAT DAMN LETTER, YOU SILLY!?

3. Holiday 
But good thing also happen in 2018. And some holiday slash stress free kind of moment where, you can really enjoy life. Malaysia is somehow the ultimate country to visit last year, where I went with sis - yeah, just the three of us - last April, and then I accompanied mom to Penang last June, and going holiday with people from MD Entertainment last August at the Independence Day, and feel the breeze of the beach - damn those are beautiful - and the sea and everything else.
Def gonna have another holiday this year!


Because no, I am not finish. Yet.

But I'm done explaining what happened it 2018. Told ya it was just a summary. And, as mentioned before, and actually the real purpose of this post, I really want to thank people who, I can barely survive last year, without help from them.

Sekali lagi ah.




>> DUA ORANG yang tinggal satu atap denganku, yang masih aja sanggup menghadapi kelakuan dan tingkahku sepanjang 2018. Yang kuat mental, jiwa raga, jasmani dan rohani, melihat aku dan perbuatanku di sepanjang tahun 2018, dan masih aja bisa melewati hari-hari hidup bersamaku. Dua orang yang meskipun lebih muda dari aku, tapi seringnya lebih dewasa dalam bertingkah dan berpikir daripada aku. Dua orang yang justru lebih paham apa yang harus dikerjakan dan dilakukan daripada aku. Dua orang yang menopang aku pas ketika jadi pengangguran. Dua orang yang kadang masih  ku cuekin kalau cerita, atau gak fokus ku dengarkan, atau sering kesal karna tindakan, perbuatan, kata-kata, atau entah apa lagi. Dua orang yang, seperti kata bapak, udah jadi teman sekongkol ku, dimana kami sering sekali bekerja sama saat bekerja dan bersama. Dua orang yang entah gimana bisa hebatnya nerima awak yang gini-gini aja.

>> SATU ORANG yang selama setahun ini udah sering banget aku repotin. Aku mau ngajuin resign tiga kali, dan tiap kali, pasti cerita. Pasti nanya. Pasti curhat. Aku nangis di atas ojek, curhat. Aku sedih banget karna entah apapun itu, curhat. Aku lagi kesel karna ada aja di dunia ini yang kayaknya gabisa bikin aku bahagia, curhat. Aku lagi bete karna entah hal kecil yang ganggu, curhat. Aku lagi bego dengan segala kejadian gak penting macam salah lantai apartemen atau takut di apartemen liat bayangan yang ternyata tanganku sendiri, curhat. Aku yang sering gak nyambung juga pas diceritain, eh curhat. Bahkan giliran dia yang lagi cerita, eh aku masih bales curhat. Mungkin emang seringnya aku cuma ngerepotin sama jadi beban doang, maapin ya. Tapi beneran kok, aku bakal ngurang-ngurangin curhat, dan yang jelas juga ngurangin ngerepotin taun depan. Maapin juga kalo seringnya bikin kesel karna aku gak nyambung atau lama banget ngertinya. Maapin juga karna aku kadang kena mood swing parah dan dijutekin; atau malah jadi pelampiasan buat aku marah-marah. Makasihnya sih banyak banget, gatau untuk apa aja. Makasih udah dengerin, mau ngasi saran, berulang-ulang ngingetin, sampe ya sabar-sabar aja gitu padahal kejadiannya ya itu lagi itu lagi dan akunya aja yang bandel bukan main. Bahkan sampe hal super gak penting yang masih aja dikerjain padahal asli, sekali lagi, gak penting sama sekali.

>> SATU ORANG yang, kenalnya sih baru, baru banget bahkan ketika aku masuk di kantor yang baru ini, tapi eh tapi, masak ya punya kesamaan yang banyak banget. Punya jalan idup yang entah gimana, lucu banget juga. Dan dalam waktu dekat bisa dekat. Luar biasa banget sih, sobat gibahku ini. Beneran kayak dipertemukan di acara Jalinan Kasih sih ini kita, semacam takdir begitu kayaknya. Mentok udah jadi curahan cerita hal-hal yang macam-macamnya, gak pernah juga diceritakan ke siapa-siapa. Luar biasa dalam waktu singkat bisa jadi tong sampahku untuk semua cerita-cerita sampahku. Semoga kuat-kuat aja ngadapin gue, karena itu juga sebagai latian ibu kuat ngadepin kembaran gue.  Tahan-tahanin aja ye, itung-itung lagi try out ibaratnya. Ujian sesungguhnya mah, kalau udah sering belajar sama gue, ya 80 sampai 90 persen bisa lah lulus sama produksi cetakan yang sama denganku itu. Segala pake ngasi hampers, jadi enak.